Technically there is a red carpet, if you count the several dingy feet of fabric on the sidewalk. Otherwise, Planet Hollywood is light years away from actual Hollywood. And yet, it's one of the least-bad chain restaurants in Times Square. The restaurant is ideal for middle-school choir groups about to catch a matinée of The Lion King. But it's also surprisingly recommendable to any local with a taste for offbeat kitsch.

Reopened after its 2020 closure—and one of only four Planet Hollywoods left on planet Earth—this location dispenses with the long-standing premise of the franchise. Instead of showcasing props and costumes, like Dorothy’s ruby slippers or the Batmobile, the Times Square Planet Hollywood promises an immersive video experience. On this count, it does not deliver.

photo credit: Planet Hollywood

photo credit: Planet Hollywood

photo credit: Planet Hollywood

Yes, there are screens all around the dining room. But they mostly play decade-old music videos, or generic stock footage. You’re on a spaceship. A knight battles a dragon. And then there’s a rooftop steampunk casino? The clumsiness of the execution is kind of spectacular, if only because it makes it more fun to guess what could possibly come next. Sharks swimming to a Billie Eilish track? Check.

video credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

Even on a purely unironic level, there’s plenty to like. Servers are kind and attentive. The food comes out fast, and it's not too bad. The appetizer sampler served on a silver Ferris wheel is actually pretty good. And the restaurant’s many screens do have one purpose we really enjoy. 

Order a sundae, and when they ask if it’s someone’s birthday, say yes. Your ice cream will arrive in a giant martini glass, with a blazing sparkler that smells like a tire fire, as your server records your party on a tablet, live-streaming it around the dining room like an indoor jumbotron. Hope you’re ready for your close-up.

Food Rundown

photo credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

Nachos Grande

This isn’t a gourmet experience, but there’s something deeply nostalgic and satisfying about this platter, thoughtfully layered with chicken chili, pickled jalapeños, cheddar cheese sauce, sliced black olives, ice cream-like scoops of guacamole, and squirts of sour cream from a bag. We would change nothing about these nachos. We would order them on every visit. Our leftovers required two separate takeout containers.

video credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

The Walk Of Fame High Roller

The menu fails to mention that this appetizer sampler comes on a Ferris wheel. One that doesn’t move, but still, that’s the definite highlight. Plus, the prime rib sliders are juicy, and the “chicken crunch” with breading as sweet as breakfast cereal is actually delicious. Steer clear of the too-salty blackened shrimp.

photo credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

Spicy Rigatoni Vodka

Aggressively underseasoned, but not bad. There's a hint of lingering spice on the back end.

photo credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

L.A. Lasagna

This lasagna is the cursed offspring of Don Angie’s lasagna pinwheels and Cheesecake Factory’s cheeseburger egg rolls. The bolognese filling is just fine, but the deep-fried pasta containing it is chewy and upsetting.

photo credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

Chicken Pot Pie

In reality, a thin chicken soup wearing a hat of flaky puffy pastry. It’s a nice chicken soup, though, as long as you know what you’re in for.

photo credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

Cheeseburger Cheeseburger!

A good, meaty burger with cheddar on toasty brioche—and it actually comes cooked to the temperature you requested, which is no small marvel.

photo credit: Molly Fitzpatrick

Brownie Sundae Martini

Spiritually, the dessert equivalent of the nachos, in that a) this is made with grocery store-type ingredients and b) we have no complaints. Over a soft, fudgy brownie base, each sundae is topped with—according to our server—an entire can of whipped cream.